BLACK MEN , CHILD OF THE SOIL YOU ON YOUR OWN

 "Merely by describing yourself as black you have started a road towards emancipation, you have committed yourself to fight against all forces that seek to use your blackness as a stamp that marks you out as a subservient being." - Steve Biko 

I wish I knew what it was that the colour of my pigment holds against the world. For my bare black feet walk on all the riches of this world that you would think I'd become somewhat rooted to wealth. Instead it is I that digs and harvests all the riches from my forefathers land and presents it in a trolley for the master to polish and sell whilst I get the pennies on the buck. We now knock on doors with foundation laid on what used to be ours because we have become beggars to the rich folks. We possess a demon that our ancestors are ashamed of because we speak in tongues unknown to them. We watch the rich men live off the blood and sweat of our ancestors and all we can do is apply for positions to be maids and janitors.

We are the stem of our society, men of the soil and daughters of the land. We pride ourselves of what no longer belongs to us for we sold it for some cheap man’s cloth and education that still doesn’t benefit us no matter how far we go. We sit surrounded by laminated years of late nights studying with bellies empty like the future that we ought to have. It’s a cycle of discomfort and sadly we blame it all on the colour of our pigment. 

How long will we live as beggars of this world, how long will we be reminded that it is we, the indigenous people who are poor and exploited in the land of our birth. So absorbed in another man’s culture because our own lacks popularity, it never stood a chance because you shout and exude a foreign culture because you are ashamed of yours. It’s as though you are under some spell because nothing about your real heritage makes sense to you. It’s either you are alive and proud or you are dead, for when you are dead you will wish you were alive to learn more and accept who you really are.

It is I that turned my back on the land and my roots when it did not serve me. I the rich cousin that made it and now turned my entire back on my tribe. You will fight to get through each and every phase, barricade to get to the top just to find out that your biggest opponent was that of the same skin tone as yours. Until then it’s each one on their own to fend for themselves. 

Dear Black Child wake up for tomorrow your great grandchildren will bare witness to the foolery and little to no foundation that you left for them to build on. Wake up before they become a result of your failures. The wars and the crimes don't have to be the same, just because we grew up in poverty does not necessarily mean that's where we all ought to end up, you can change it, we can change it for the next generation. 

GROWING PAINS

 "Little by little we grow up, it's hard. Most people don't grow up, they just get older." -Maya Angelou

Growing up is hard, it's uncomfortable because each phase of your life is new, unfamiliar and ever changing. And change like we all know is the hardest. All of us have come to terms with too much pain, although we repress it it's still there. The worst is that of not being wanted, of realising your parents do not need you in the way that you need them.

MISTAKES are meant to happen once and only once, more than that then that was not a mistake but a choice. Mistakes aren't made to make you feel less of a good person but there to assist you in making better decisions. It wouldn't be easy to understand yourself without making a few mistakes in your life. Plus they help you grow.

FRIENDS you can truly and honestly live without them, if you've been burnt once don't be too trusting. They can disappoint you so the best, most loyal, and one person you can depend on is truly yourself. Don't invest to much when it comes to friendships. Each person that comes into your life is there to serve a purpose, whether it's short or long-term take the good that they choose to show you because really in the end we will all outgrow each other at some point. 

LOVE yourself first and others after because loving yourself means having an understanding of yourself that allows you to show your confidence to the world. 

HAPPINESS is a choice so for each and every morning that you wake up choose to be happy, choose to smile and share positivity. 

LIFE will never make sense if you aren’t InTouch with your spirituality, whether we like it or not we must agree to the fact that we are spiritual beings and if we are not connected to our spirituality we will forever linger without ever being satisfied. We will always seek more than what already exists in the physical but when we are content and InTouch with our spirituality we will forever be happy.

For each and every one of us in life we have a turn back moment, either you move forward or you give up but before you give up you should always keep in mind that the only guarantee about giving up is that it will never happen, no way under the sun.

So whatever it is that you do in life, don’t give up because Uzoba ngumthwalo kabani? 🤔🤔

THE YEAR OF HIGHS AND MANY LOWS

 2020 The End of Yet Another Era

Everybody in life reaches a point where they face both Highs and Lows, life is not always roses and peaches and neither is it always gloomy and painful. You ought to go through both phases in life because both serve as a test, when you are at your highs always remain humble and at your Lows always remember that lows don’t last forever. Throughout this year I’ve learnt to be more appreciative of what I have than to be stuck thinking of all that I want, I’ve grown to appreciate the little things and realized that faith carries us even in the most painful times of our lives.

I used to love the beach and how the sound of waves and water splashing on rocks echoed nothing but peace and calmness into my ears, for so long I would see meditation on television and not know it’s importance in my daily routine until this year. 2020 made me appreciate even the sound of birds chirping and the peaceful sound of trees and the water running down the river. This year made me aware of the little things that nature has for us to help ease the mind. Let me flashback to my 2020.

Saying 2020 was a struggle for many is an understatement, This year was tough and draining both mentally and emotionally. Not everyone could have foreseen the hardship that this year had in Store for us but very few were fortunate enough to have been prepared for it all. 

From schools closing to businesses shutting down. Lockdown levels that forced us to face every single challenge head-on instead of sweeping it under the rug. Mental breakdowns, depression, stress became a norm for many. It was death after death, loss of those we even thought would stand the test of time. Anxiety was at its all time high for others as job loss became a thing. From bad decisions and fallouts, mistakes and so on.

I guess all in all 2020 was not what anyone had on their resolution list if that’s still even a thing because if anything nobody really got what they wanted. So what has the year taught you?. For me it actually showed me that with all that I am and that I could be, I’m definitely not incharge and anything could happen and within a blink of an eye things could change, forcing each and everyone of us to adapt, refocus and start up fresh. So take what 2020 was as a learning curve, align yourself with all that is good and positive. Look at each day as a brand new start to life and work on yourself every single day until you get it right. You can do it, if only you can start..

2021 is a chance to refocus and start over.

Xoxo 

Spring Has Sprung or Has It?

New Season New Beginnings

"If you feel like you are losing everything, remember trees lose their leaves every year and they still stand tall and wait for better days."

The season to bloom, the season to see good even after all the downfalls you've had. The season to grow because here comes summer and you will shine throughout. We all have winter days, but ask yourself what's a few downfalls when you have a blooming season that awaits you. You can cut off all the flowers but you can't keep spring from coming.

The month of September somewhat reminds me of the first of January, New Year's resolutions and so much to look forward to. You are somewhat motivated and feel like the world is your oyster and all things are possible, The sun is shining which some look at as a sign of better days, The grass is greener, the flowers are blooming and all looks good and promising enough. 

What resolutions forget to acknowledge is that being human is being imperfect, and we make mistakes, we can not live upto all of societies expectations. Alot gets thrown our way and balancing it all is unrealistic for many, The time it takes to enact positive change often cannot be controlled adding a sense of stress and urgency to resolutions when in reality, resolutions like promises and goals and plans, fall apart. That is life.

We have somewhat made it a thing to chase dreams and limit ourselves to a specific time period, somewhat have become ok with putting pressure and looking at others to see were we should be. Goals do not have a time frame, like dreams they are a journey and like life they are ever changing. Each moment being placed at a specific time to make you see how far you can possibly go.

Don't forget that everyday is a new day and you can try again if you need to, no pressure because you'll get there eventually.

Women's Month: Week 4

     CHANGES FOR I

If there's one thing that's guaranteed in life, it's that change is inevitable. Whether we've planned for it or not, life has a way of surprising us. The best we can do, is to take those unexpected turns as opportunities for personal growth, self-reflection and new beginnings. Like flowers and trees, we have to bloom, wilt and bloom again. Rebirth reminds us that at every end exists new beginnings. By leaving behind the things we cannot change, we make room for new beginnings and move forward with hope and grace.

The complex relationship we all have with change because it is powerful enough to bring people together, or it can tear them apart. Change is a process and it takes place exactly when it needs to happen, Change is growth.

Change for I is understanding that we are all on earth but each person has a unique and different journey. Change for I is acknowledging that I'm not entirely in control of were this journey of life will take me. Change for I is being content with myself and what I have. Change for I is aknowledging that there are challenges in life but if you stand strong you can overcome them.

Change for I is willingness to learn everyday, not because you are dum but because you understand there is so much to learn in this thing called life. Change for I is knowing my worth and not accepting everything. Change for I is respecting myself so that others may do so too. Change for I is knowing that I am capable of greatness.

Change for I is standing firm in the things that I believe in. Change for I is being a great representative of my gender. Change for I is understanding that the possibilities are endless and my dreams and aspirations are valid. Change for I is living the life that I've always envisioned for myself with no regrets.

Change for are is sticking to what I know best and not competing with anyone else. Change for I is believing in myself and what I can become. Change for I is working at bettering myself and those around me. Change for I is knowing that I'm not a failure and working on the things that I did not succeed at.

Change for I is knowing that my sister's troubles and downfalls are not for my amusement. Change for I is knowing that I lend a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on for my sister. Change for I is rejoicing in my sister's success because jealousy does not suit me in any way shape or form. Change for I is having the purest heart with no judgement. Change for I is knowing that if we stand together United no one can ever come between us.

As we end the month of August, the month of women's month, start making changes and acknowledging changes that you need to do in your life. Nobody is perfect but strive for absolute perfection at everything that you do. Be the change that you want to see in others, it all starts with you. Women United conquer and succeed at everything because they help each other stay on top 🙏.

Women's Month : Week 3

WISDOM CARRIER'S

"Leadership is about making others better as a result of your presence, and making sure that impact lasts in your absence. Leadership is not bullying, Leadership is not aggression. Leadership is the ability to use your voice for the betterment of others and the world, be a voice for the voiceless."

To our strong women who lead us with grace and poise even when they feel like the weight of the world is on their shoulders. To the wisdom carriers and heroines, to the women who set out to make a difference not only in their communities but the world at large. 

To the women in executive seats may you have a heart and generosity that is willing to pass on information and motivational words to those who wish to sit on such seats as well. May we be able to stand together not only in difficult times but in great moments,  may we cheer each other on the most  wholeheartedly and remove jealousy. The time for us to prosper and nature our talents and uniqueness, The time to stand strong together and not be divided. 

To the women that do not conform to gender norms and believe in them self, let's continue to build a nation of young girls who strive for excellence. Young women who can challenge themselves because they've seen the generation before them do it all. Let's remove belittling, let's remove jealousy, let's remove division and let's remove negativety in our dialogues.

Dear Grandma 

For years you have been mom to the village and until this day you still sit steadily on the couch and welcome everyone with a smile on your face, offering them a cup of tea before telling them about your garden. You have  passed on great wisdom from generations to generations, you've seen the world and it's challenges but you still view life as an amazing blessing that God gave us. The strength that you have and your resilience, the life long lessons that you taught me, 

The importance of Love - The love that you continue to show me and my cousin's, the love that you have for each and every child in the village, unconditional that's what it is. We are all equal in your eyes. Each one of us different in our own right but you nature each and everyone of our talents because you believe in who we are and what we can become.

The importance of Family- No matter how far you go in life and how busy you are, always find time for your family because they are the only truth in your life. Always remind them of how much you value them in life. Respect each other and stick together no matter what.

Dear Mom

For all my life I've watched you take care of our family and waking up very early in the morning to make sure my brother and I were ready for school all whilst making sure that you were ready for your days work as an Educator. You've carried so much in your life as a single parent but yet you've made it look so effortless and we've never heard you complain nor see you breakdown. You continue to be the glue that keeps this tiny family of ours together, you continue to strive for more because you are an example to most of the children at your school.

You push through walls of steal just to make sure that my brother and I are happy, I've watched you try and keep it together when times were tough because I was ill. If anything I pray and hope that I am twice the woman you are to my own kids if not better because that's what you've always told me to strive for.

Dear Women

Open your heart to young girls who need guidance, live a life that's meaningful to most and let your presence be felt even in your absence. Open your arms to young girls who need love for we know they will seek it in all the wrong places. Remove judgement and criticism because that's what makes them run away from seeking advice. Be a vessel and open yourself up to them so that they may have a better life, be an example and try to keep them away from making the same mistakes that you made. Love them, and nature their talents because they are the future.

XoXo

WOMEN'S MONTH: WEEK 2

 YOUNG GIRL TO TEENAGE ADULT

I often wonder where the future of our next generation is, what will become of them?, Do they even have role models?, Do they aspire to be anything other than what they grew up seeing?. Young girls carrying out their parents visions of what they hoped they would become, a generation that is so greatly influenced by what they see on mainstream pop culture. 

I know a six year old young girl that wakes Up to no water nor electricity and has to walk X Amount of kilometres to school because "Education is the key to success" or atleast that's what we've heard all our lives.

I know a 7 year old young girl that lives with an abusive stepfather and dreads sunset because all she can think of is what "Dad" is going to do to her whilst mom is asleep, she can't even come out and say it because "You don't speak badly of your elders" or atleast that's what we know.

I know a thirteen year old young girl that waits for all her friends to get picked up by their parents in lavish cars and is too ashamed to be seen using public transport.

I know a fourteen year old young girl who points out a nice neighborhood because she is too ashamed to be seen living in a shack.

I know a fifteen year old young girl who doesn't meet the netball team squard requirements, disproportioned body and Mama Joyce is her name as she reminds them of the lady that sells fatcakes outside the schoolyard.

I know a sixteen year old young girl who just fell pregnant and is struggling to come to terms with becoming a parent at her age and is handed out a pamphlet by a stranger on the street with a quick way out of that "embarrassment" by some self qualified Dr Abedingo.

I know a seventeen year old young girl who just lost both her parents and is now contemplating dropping out of high school because mom and dad left nothing now there are four siblings to feed and she ends up on the corner of Kloof Street.

I know a nineteen year old young girl who comes from an impoverished background and didn't qualify for a scholarship and now has a year of heading to the wrong direction because she has 24hrs a day of complete boredom.

I know young girls that are stuck in relationships that never even begun because if she's seen holding hands with "Thando" then that means She's the hottest thing since sliced bread.

I know young girls that didn't see Dad in the household so they end up going to Sandton to look for him, fancy suite, nicely trimmed beard, fat wallet, oh that must be him because after all Daddy is a Provider.

I know of a young girl that saved herself for marriage until one late evening on her way from the shop a group of men cornered her and raped her behind the bushes and just like that she lost all her innocence.

To the generation that comes after me ,young girls with dreams and aspirations, future scientists, lawyers, doctors, teacher's and artists here's a message for you. There is so much to life than the moon and stars you gazed at until dawn. No matter how plain a woman may be if truth and honesty are written across her face, she will forever be beautiful.

Beauty comes from knowing who you really are, Beauty is self acceptance and knowing and understanding your worth, Beauty is independence being able to aspire to be things greater than what you grew up being surrounded by. Beauty is Strength being able to face each and every challenge head on because you know that you can conquer almost everything. Beauty is love being able to love yourself first but also have a genuine love for others without wanting to be rewarded. Beauty is being proud in all your flaws and understanding that nobody is perfect but instead embracing what you do have. Beauty is confidence and most importantly beauty is being comfortable in your own skin.

You are greater than your mistakes, and what's life without a couple of hiccups and bad Decisions. You can fall flat 8 times and still get back up on the 9th and remember there's always room for improvement. There is no such thing as failure just a wrong path that will help you refocus and get back on the right path. Live an honest and truthful life but above all live a life with purpose.

So to the Grandmother's, Mother's, Aunts and Big Sisters out there what have you done to help shape the future Mother's,Aunts and Big Sisters of today?